Feelin' fat

I'm kind of struggling with this weight loss thing. On one hand, I hate how I look every day, and it's making me miserable. On the other hand, I know that if I let the "diet" go out of control, I'll lose 20 pounds and STILL be miserable. I also want to try to lose weight kind of slowly, to avoid hair loss and skin problems. Before, it was so bad that my hairdresser noticed and had to do strange things to my hair to make the tufts at the front not so noticable... :(

I NEED to lose some weight. All I can think about when I'm in bed at night is my fat stomach hanging to the side, an when I'm sitting down, my fat ass squishing out, and when I'm walking, my fat thighs jiggling. Let's not even talk about the flab on my upper arms.... I didn't have a good start yesterday. During the day I ate:
2 light 'n fit yogurts, 60 cals each
about 1/2 cup leftover chinese
one teensy teensy sliver of a small pizza, must have been 80 cals max
6 little pieces of cucumber sushi, don't know cals but not many
8 or so little rice crisps things, 70 cals.

I was doing pretty good, and then... I had my vegetarian indian food cooking class, and I pigged out there on the stuff we made. I only have two more classes though, and it's only once a week, so I can plan for it, calorie wise. That made yesterday a loss though. Today is a new day.

So far I've had a little shredded wheat, no milk= probably 150 cals.

I WILL have a successful day today.

This is gonna be hard for me... I eat a ton, and I eat constantly. Once I get used to eating little it'll be ok, but right now, my tummy wants FOOD FOOD FOOD. Well, it can't have it, it's just going to have to eat my fat ass instead.

I'm off to get a scale. Wish me luck and support, I need it from you thin ladies.